Are you hott?

As you may well be aware oil prices are not looking so good. (That is unless your OPECish) It is no surprise that Ask Zach Inc keeps the thermostat at 55 F. It is hard enough to pay for oil, but even harder when you’re a company that has no income, no business plan, no customers, no foosball table, and no Razor Scooters to get around the office with.

(We make it up in volume- Rusty CEO Ask Zach Inc.)

So in response to your question I am rather coldd.

Now if I could only get into the room with the server farm.

hi zach im a huge 1# fan I LOVE YOU!first i want to ask...do you say your name like i do?Zach

And people wonder why I am afraid to post where I live.

why do people never seem to able to whisper?

What? Did you say something? You will have to speak a little louder. I don’t hear as well as I used to.

Not sure what a listper is, but sounds interesting.

my brother's name is zach do you know him?

I don’t know many Zachs as I missed out on the 2005 Zach convention in Vegas. If your last name is Silverman, Braff, or Cone I know your brother otherwise sorry.

where do you live?

Latitude = 42.3230, Longitude = -71.0984

(got to keep the stalkers away)

if a boy calls me to do something every weekend but then when we finally have plans to do something breaks them what does that mean?

1. You are living a real life episode of Degrassi and he got grounded the one time you finally said yes. He was then afraid to tell you the truth because he was afraid you would think he was a broomhead.

2. He is very disorganized and mixed up the days he was going to meet up with you on.

3. He either got scared / sick / abducted by aliens / eaten by his dog/ was held hostage (or some other lame excuse)

The best solution is call him up and say he better meet up with you next week. No excuses. He doesn’t show you never talk to him again. No excuses this time (so tell him to stay away from the UFOs)

is your name really zack?

Nope it is not. It is all a lie I am really a blog actor. It is a new kind of actor that plays out his or her role over a blog. I am part of the same union as the Fake Steve Jobs.

Also, I know there is only a 3 letter difference but H and K are different.

what is going on?

I am sitting down at my computer getting ready to answer some questions.

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Zach, are you a natural blonde?

Well like I am like so blond. When you asked me that question I was like as if. I am like totally natural fer shur.

my boyfriend just got his long hair (kind of the length of yours in that picture) cut really short. I no longer find him physicaly attractive, should

You can always buy a wig the length you like and super glue it to his head while he is sleeping

We interrupt this answer to bring you a message form the Ask Zach Lawyer Harold Dewey: You can not sue Ask Zach / ZC Industries for any injuries or suffering resulting from following the advice of this imbecile.

Now back to the rest of the answer:

Another option talk to him with a hair care and dating counsel or

You could also try and make a list of other qualities you like about him Can’t think of an then dump the man fast already (DTMFA) for a male model since looks seem to mean a lot to you